Nobody's going to help out those guys in the car crash otherwise. ...
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Look at Ron Paul and his kung fu-esque pose – even he looks like he knows enough to defend his sorry ass. Why shouldn't you? ...
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Don't kid yourself. Just because you can pull off a realistic Dr. Spock dosn't mean you can affect the way people think of you. Sometimes, you need to work your ass off to make friends, or to avoid making enemies, at least. ...
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Bill Gates is pretty much untouchable now, but it's a sure bet that his stint in prison back when he was younger helped him become the straight-arrow he is today. That is how much prison can change a man. Keep that in mind the next time you get pulled over for drunk driving. ...
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Seriously. Don't wear Elvis threads without any underpants when you're the size of a blubber factory. Have some decency and respect for yourself. ...
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This moment of John Edwards will make him the butt of all electoral jokes for weeks. Never look stupid in public, - even if you're doing it on purpose. ...
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It's fun and it's sweet – and it has its benefits. But the fact remains that marijuana kills the thinking capacity of some individuals. Here is a photo of George Bush with the weed, a prime example of the drug's debilitating capacity. ...
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Really. It is. Never mind if you're built like a Grecian sculpture, streaking is embarassing for both you and the people watching you. Drink a double shot of single malt before attempting. ...
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You do not own other people. To call their music stupid is one thing, but to call them stupid is like 9/11: an open assault for no given reason. Don't be an asshole. Don't pretend to be cooler because you dance to intelligent dance music....
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Easier said than done, but Eddie Murphy can pull it off while acting like an idiot. It could be the clothes, or it could be the man himself – which makes one think. If a funny man can look good while playing the fool, what's stopping me from doing the same thing? ...
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